With whimsical cutouts for maximum sideboob exposure, this linen-blend frock by Meadow Rue is complete with generous pockets for afternoon’s sun-kissed treasures.
Gold-wrapped cording, velvet ribbons and fringy tassels come to a point, although that point is clearly lost on me; perfect to lay over v-neck tops or strapless dresses.
Is this ridged pull a rose, or a carved button of grainy wood? No, I’m legitimately asking. I lost feeling in my hands, what with the paint I’ve been huffing.
We’re entranced by the sharply pleated panels and angled yoke of Leifsdottir’s silky wider-than-wide-legs. Maybe it’s because they scream, “LOOK AT MY VAGINA, IT’S RIGHT HERE.”
Best worn after a hefty dose of E or poppers, a hefty dose of sparkle spills over Miista’s not-so-serious slip-ons.
Expertly hooked openwork epitomizes warm-weather dressing. We’d throw it over a colorful slip and add slouchy ankle boots, but only because we live in a country with decency laws. By Knitted & Knotted.
Slender and hammered like that whore your ex married, this gilded halo is destined to crown your bare, empty, lonely hand.
Fluid arcs course down a soft brook of puckered jersey. Oh, uh… sorry about the… fluid arcs. Let me take that to the cleaners for you.
Carve out your memories on the pages of this embossed leather diary. Sample entry:
“Dear diary, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but today I actually got tired of listening to Andrew Bird. Please don’t tell anyone.”
Handcrafted of smooth wood and speckled in a spectrum of natural shades, this bench is perfect for entryway comings (brothels) and goings (bathrooms).
